It's pretty simple, someone posts "If life gives you [insert item,etc]..." and then the next person replies with what you do in that case. The replier then posts their own "If life gives you."
I'll start:
If life gives you a chef competition...
...then you better make sure that beef is not undercooked to the point it's eating the salad you made.
If life gives you potatoes..
... make garlic frys!
If life gives you stinky socks...
you throw them at your bratty little sibbling. XD
... life gives you video games
... you play it and play some more
If life gives you a hammer..
You smash some barrels, climb some ladders, save a princess and knock a gorilla off of his steel perch.
If life gives you a magical State Farm agent....
.....you abuse the ability to summon them and grant infinite wishes.
If life gives you a lightbulb...
... you keep it in case of emergency.
If life gives you a wet burrito...
... you ask for tapatio!
If life gives you water...
Make Kool aide
If life gives you gas cards ..
travel to the ends of the earth.
if life gives you insomnia...
...watch over those who are sleeping.
If life gives you a hard place...
... then do what you can to get through it!
If life gives you more lives..
...then spend them living life!!
If life gives you a snickers...
... you stop being grumpy!
If live gives you watermelons..
... make a fruit salad!
If life gives you weeds in your garden but no trash can...
... you get a big plastic bag and put it there.
If life gives you a clown...
.. you start a circus.
If life gives you a hard time ...
... then party hard!
If life gives you mud...
... then you make mud cake and feed it to the pigeons
If life gives you an umbrella...
...use it to fly away like Marry Popins!
If life gives you rain...
... then it life has given you water.
If live gives you a wheel...
...then ride on home!
If life gives you a pen...
...then break it!!
If life gives you a pig...
... then love it! "Piggy!!!"
If life gives you wood...
...build a hobbit hole!!!
hare?
... you hunt it, if you're a hare hunter!
If life gives you a second chance in redemption...
... you take it and make him need to redeem itself to you!
If life gives you oranges...
... you make orange juice out of it!
If life gives you a screwdriver...
... You can finally get around to fixing that loose hinge on that cabinet door in the kitchen!
If life gives you a LOL-Cat ...
... then laugh freely.
If life throws an unexpected sitution at you...
... then you improvise, like doing a guitar solo!
If live gives a de ja vu...
...then learn french!
If life gives you a neverending book...
... you already know how to reach Neverland!
If life gives you a diskette...
...throw it like a frisbee
If life gives you Ash's chainsaw...
... counter with the buzzsaw rifle from Gears of War!!
If life gives you predatorial aliens...
...RUN! GET TO THE CHOPPA!
If life gives you a free Fanime badge...
Laugh at all the broke people!!
If life gives you a password...
... you hack in all of the systems you can think of!
If life gives you a butter knife...
korean jesus!!! i have bread!!
if life gives you a hot pocket?
... Then I will eat them all. All of them!
If life gives you a computer with only a terminal (black screen with just texts to do commands)...
you become the fat guy on Jurassic Park!
If life gives you your own theme music....
Be one heck of an icon.
If life gives you wings...
... then you throw away the Red Bull you just bought from 7-Eleven!
If life gives you the love of your life...
... you love the love of your life until theres no life to have.
If life gives you a mouse with a cookie...
... you name that mouse, "Nibbles" and give him more cookies!
If life gives you Ren and Stimpy...
... you play "happy happy joy joy".
If life gives you a friend who isn't on Skype..
High five!!! I'm not being watched!!
If life gives you a chicken...
You eat it. Eat it!!
If life gives you a bucket of ice...
sit in it!!
If life gives you air freshener...
...you put it in 01's shoes!
If life gives you pie...
...strap lucifergundam to a chair and eat it in front of him.
If life gives you a vampire ...
...have that vampire turn 01 into a ghoul!
If life gives you ice cream...
...zap it with a ray gun.
If life gives you Lucifergundam...
...you correct it by typing "Lucifargundam".
If life gives you "01"...
you insert her into a Vocaloid program!
If life gives you a fighting giant...
Then smash "Lucifargungam".
If life gives you spellcheck...
You use it with Autocorrect!
If live gives you a bear...
... you send it roaring after 01.
If life gives you spirit...
Have it curse Lucifargundam!!!
If life gives you a potpie ....
...throw it at 01!!
If life gives you enemies...
you make enemy soup!
If life gives you an Amazonian woman...
*You give her to a man named Buck, because he likes to.... (Far Cry 3 reference)*
*Throws salmon*
....you have a samon dinner?? ^^^(i think youre doing it wrong)
If life gives you pineapples on your pizza
...I won't touch the pineapple; I'm allergic to it.
If life gives you a dragon...
...I won't eat it- it'll try to kill me.
If life gives you a pen and paper...
... you are now a writer!
If life gives you a paradox...
... you get me.
When life gives you me...
... then you become paradox incarnate
If life gives you Dave's Insanity Sauce that reads, "drink the entire sauce, get $1,000,000"...
...you drink it when you havent had anything to eat/drink for a few days.
If life gives you a soundtrack to a game you havent played...
... I listen to it, and then sells it to ebay
If life gives you your crush for one week...
*shows post to friend, and they say*...sweet!!! Their mine!!!Don't touch them!!!! I WILL BITE YOU!!!
#anywho...#
If life gives you a marble ...
... you play with it and collect more marbles!
If life gives you a box...
... you put 01 in it.
If life gives you a jack-in-the-box...
... you start selling Jumbo Jacks.
If life gives you raisins ...
... dunk them in chocolate & yogurt.
If life gives you dragons...
... you become a dragonborn!
If life gives you a cookie dough...
... you eat it or put it in your ice cream! 'Cuz no-one is allowed to put cookiedough in ovens anymore after WWIII.
If life gives you lemons...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dwMnWEAoXbU
Wash your face with them!
If life gives you the hunger games ...
... you beat them as Ghandi!!!
If life gives you a tank...
... you go around the world with it!
If life gives you a version of you from a parallel world...
...you hang out with yourself and have best day ever!!!
If life gives you bizzaro you...
rip up the comics!
If life gives you a flower...
... stick it on someone's head.
If life gives you a box full of ribbons...
...then you roll around with them!
if life gives you cat mario...
...you throw mouse luigi
^did not post a "if life gives you"
If life gives you a trashcan...
^my phone messed up unexplainably somehow while i was at work...
...you either fill it up or kick it over!
If life gives you a weight bench...
^ah, understood
Watch it as it collects dust.
If life gives you a box...
you go to Robot Pirate Island!
If life gives you jury duty....
...you enjoy your vacation time off from work and do your civil duty.
If life gives you injustice...
... you play as Deathstroke and spam the hell out of the gun shots
If life gives you a hidden blade...
you stop the evil ninjas!
If life gives you a flying hat....
.... you fly on it.
If life gives you a portal gun...
"Hehe" ~Zzzzttt...worp~
If life gives you Alice fro Alice :madness returns..
... you say hi to her
If life gives you your future husband/wife...
...you marry them and live happily ever after.
If life gives you the anti-you...
Join forces with them if they aren't weak or defeat them if they are.
If life gives you a love-struck dolphin....
...you name it flipper.
If life gives you "Shekaka"...
...hide in the basement!!
If life gives you Samus from Metroid ...
... you team up with her to beat the bad guys, then you marry her!
If life gives you Rammstein...
...then Buch Dich!
If life gives you a vocaloid-chobit....
Then I'm malfunctioning.
If life gives you a mustard plant..
...you make it into mustard.
If life gives you a chance at the Olympics....
you invent a full proof plan to win the gold!
If life gives you psychic powers...
...you open up anouther dimension.
If life gives you a song...
... you sing your worries away!
If life gives you schnapps (German term for any hard liquor)...
...you drink like its Oktoberfest!
If life gives you Hollywood....
... you sing Red Hot Chili Pepper's "Californication" song and talk about Hollywood all day!
If life gives you a Friday...
...you call out "TGIF!!!".
If life gives you a Sunday...
Start crying because tomorrow is Monday.
If life gives you whip cream...
... you pronounce "Cool Whip" in Stewie's accent!
If life gives you a party...
then I'm so happy!!!
If life gives you corn...
...you eat it in any shape or form(like popcorn).
If life gives you grapes...
... you ferment them to make wine!
If life gives you potatoes...
...you turn them into potato vodka!
If life gives you barley...
Then i force feed it to my alpaca.
If life gives you a lock...
...you pick it and put it on someone's locker!
If life gives you popcorn...
feed it to the sprites!
If life gives you an artichoke ...
... you put it in your pizza!
If life gives you oranges...
...you make orange juice!
If life gives you candles...
Make wolf link light them all to move the statue!!!
If life gives you a flame...
you use it to revive a dying Charmander!
If life gives you a confused child...
Direct him to the wrong place!!
If life gives you a day off work...
... hooray! you are free... for the day.
If life gives you food stamps...
...you use them carefully- like they're the last wishes from a genie.
If life gives you a welfare check...
you spend accordingly on stuff you don't need!
If life gives you a personal body guard...
... you put yourself in the most dangerous scenario so he could start working!
If life gives you Call of Duty...
...you play Team Deathmatch!
If life gives you a brick of iron...
... you form it into something your mind wants!
If life gives you a basket case...
...you file it!
If life gives you a wagon...
... transform it into a giant, rolling, fire-breathing dragon.
If life gives you super powers for one hour....
...you freeze time so you can make it last as long as you want.
If life gives gives you oatmeal cookies...
... I will throw them; I don't like oatmeal cookies.
If life gives you a gateway to the future...
you go back to the future ;)
If life gives you infinite wealth but with the catch of infinite loneliness....
...you trade the infinite wealth for infinite happyiness.
If life gives you a shooting star...
you force it to grant your wish.
If life gives you a person with wicked hands...
...you have them play a wicked tune!!
If life gives you automail(FMA reference)...
you try to ignore it.
If life gives you a personal cruise ship....
... you travel the world and fine One Piece!
If life gives you the Cyclone and Joker Gaia Memories (Kamen Rider W)...
....you transform into Kamen Rider Double!
If life gives you aweful story...
... recycle it to make a beautiful Art Book.
If life gives you gravity defying hair....
...you somehow use it become a model somehow...
If life gives you a nightlight...
....turn it on and off until it burns out!!!
If life gives you an whale...
....have a Marine Biologist examine it.
If life gives you The Declaration Of Independence...
....you declare yourself independant!
If life gives you a sheet of paper...
you make yourself a private paper jet.
When life gives you the best day ever...
Then you must be talking about a convention!!
If life goes you an idea....
...you make sure it's spelled right with "gives" and not "goes.
If life gives you a blank book...
Quote from: Lucifargundam on May 19, 2013, 12:02:13 AM
...you make sure it's spelled right with "gives" and not "goes.
If life gives you a blank book...
Then you teach your phone the difference between gives and goes.
If life gives you a gumball machine...
...you steal it, and use it for your own profit!
If life gives you a sticker machine...
Then you make a bunch of stickers to sell at fanime!!!
If life gives you ice cream...
make a shake!
If life gives you a challenge...
Then challenge accepted >:3
If life gives you claws...
... you fight wolverine with it!
If life gives you Hades...
Then we can play ping pong!!
If life gives you your third person self ..
... you watch yourself do things you wouldnt want to be seen doing.
If life gives you a book you already read...
... you read it again!
If life gives you Google...
...you monopolize the world with your business!!!
If life gives you Yahoo!...
Then i go on yahoo answers and answer the algebra 2 problems!!
If life gives you "the purge"...
... get ready your toilet papers; it's about to get messy!
If life gives you the Ice Climbers...
...run away from the hammers.
If life gives you a Chemistry textbook...
Then i through it shouting "i don't want to see you till next year!!!!!!!!!!"
If life gives you a hotel room for fanime ...
...you decide whether to hog it for yourself and live free- or rent it out and make money.
If life gives you an unforgettable person...
... hang out with them as much as possible.
If life gives you an infinite supply of hats...
...you sell some you wear some! :)
If life gives you fruit punch...
...stain some rich guy's shirt.
If life gives you pooping seagulls...
...you have them poop on some rich girl's car.
If life gives you teacup potbellied pigs...
Hee-hee!!Squeely!! Oink oink!!
If life gives you a rug...
...you fly on it like a magic carpet!!
If life gives you a needle and thread...
you make it into the most dangerous weapon ever.
If life gives you an endless Smallville marathon...
...you remember what it used to be like when it was fresh in 2001...
If life gives you a unstringed guitar...
you become an air guitar master!
If life gives you the One Piece.....
...you keep it away from everyone!
If life gives you an invisibility cloak...
... use it to become a ninja.
If life gives you texts in a strange, unknown, ancient language...
...you pronounce them as best you can- and realize too late that you're summoning Cthulu...
If life gives you a doorway until a world no-one has stepped foot into...
... you just walk right though; what could possibly go wrong, right?
If life gives you the task of subduing Kratos...
...you do so with the power of love..
If life gives you unquenchable love...
...drink Gatorade
If life gives you exactly $.93...
Then i donate thw 93ยข to charity!! But consider taking a quarter for a gumball...
If life gives you a gumball...
... you chew the crap out of it and then stick it to somebody's car for being a terrible parker.
If life gives you taxes...
Then i tell who ever taxing me that I'm a minor and that they cannot charge me because my parents cover my taxes until I'm a homeowner.
If life gives you a chair...
...you sit on it, and then you get up and then sit down again
If life gives you Dave Chappelle...
...you have him star at your comedy club!
If life gives u a free drink...
you hope it is a strong drink!
If life gives you an awesome dance partner for a dance show...
... you dance with her, and then go out with her!
If life gives you all of Fourze's 40 astroswitches...
you conquer the world!
If life gives you hard hitting choices...
... you body it hard!
If life gives you a chance of doing a pilgrimage...
...you go to the place of your dreams!
If life gives you a lifetime supply of pocky...
you play the Pocky game!
If life gives you a lifetime supply of hard candy....
... choose the best butterscotch and brittle available. Package & sell the rest.
If life gives you a real life musical where everyone constantly sings....
...you would host it at next year's fanimecon at stage zero!!!
If life gave you infinite truth...
you exploit having the truth of all!
If life gives you a swarm of bees...
... you become the Pain and join the Cobra Unit! (Metal Gear Solid 3 reference)
If life gives you the Trial memory (Kamen Rider Accel's upgrade form)...
...you learn how to duplicate it.
If life gives you tonic water...
you make a tonic water slide!
If life gives you someone who can't cook....
...you hire Gordon Ramsey to give that person "motivation."
If life gives you an algorithm...
you get frustrated and leave it alone.
If life gives you sparkly skin like a Twilight vampire...
...then you either live as a fabulous vampire, or a disgrace to the vampire race..
If life gives you Daft Punk...
....you celebrate one more time!
If life gives you a stick..
you draw an anti-sea bear circle.
If life gives you a sea rhinoceros...
... you wear your sombrero upside down!
If life gives you a burrito...
...you trade it for a taco.
If life gives you a taco...
... then, you have taco!
If life gives you chipotle...
...you get bloody stools(south park reference).
If life gives you assembly language....
you use it to your advantage.
If life gives you an evil Mickey Mouse...
... you summon the real Mickey Mouse with a keyblade to fight Evil Mickey!
If life gives you a never ending space-time continuum...
...you manipulate it to your needs.
If life gives you a stun gun...
you become the Stun Master.
If life gives you a bottomless stomach....
... you eat like Luffy!
If life gives you a Rider Kick...
...then i die.
If life gives you 32ยฐF...
...you go and order a drink!
If life gives you a bad taste in your mouth...
you clean up that dirty mouth with Orbit! Fabulous!
If life gives you an arranged marriage....
... you run!
If life gives you sleeping pills...
...you give them to the young'uns.
If life gives you a bag of love...
... you spread it to everyone!
If life gives you an axe (guitar)...
...you put it in a paper shredder.
If life gives you cheese...
... you put it in a mousetrap, and let the fun begin!
If life gives you a yo-yo...
...use it to defeat all who stands in your way.
If life gives you indivuals who stand in your way...
... you give them two Rider Kicks.
(https://forums.fanime.com/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg.imgcake.com%2FNextwave%2F1320396276724gifqa.gif&hash=cb29fd912a20851055c7f0d07ebed19abbf15d24)
One Kamen Rider Joker version
(https://forums.fanime.com/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fstream1.gifsoup.com%2Fview4%2F2288878%2Fkamen-rider-kabuto-o.gif&hash=5ce765c7cba4f612d6b320ee76c3df89ca137cb4)
and one Kamen Rider Kabuto version
If life gives you atomic flavored wings...
...you eat them happily.
If life gives you a video of Christopher Walken tap dancing...
...you tell him to break a leg.
If life gives you a nutcracker ballet...
...you obnoxiously eat peanuts in the audience.
If life gives you an octorok...
...you beat it until it resembles sushi.
If life gives you a bad taste in your mouth...
... you spit it out!
If life gives you the unfair side of things...
...you turn it to the fair side while no one's looking.
If life gives you a fire...
...you make smores!
If life gives you infinite enemies...
... you transform into Kamen Rider Wizard's Infinity style and destroy the infinite enemies!
(https://gs1.wac.edgecastcdn.net/8019B6/data.tumblr.com/4aba0d2dc085a7dfadf25377554f8d1a/tumblr_mla3ceRFdV1qaben4o9_500.gif)
If life gives you a dinosaur...
...you ride it like Jesus did when he invented rodeos!
If life gives you old popcorn...
... you give it to Beavis and Butthead again, and tell them they can score more chicks than they could possibly ever count!
If life gives you Charlie Murphy...
...you have him impersonate eddie murphy.
If life gives you Martha Stewart
...you celebrate the holidays topless.
If life gives you a beetle...
...you burn it before it crawls under your skin!
If life gives you The Mummy...
...you watch a watered-down Leon Kennedy.
If life gives you face cam...
...you face the cam.
If life gives you a cameo of your face...
You sing about it being a cameo lover.
If life gives you a discount...
...you use it to save money to go to Hawaii.
If life gives you the best friend anyone could ever ask for...
...you sweat uncontrollably.
If life gives you a scenery...
...you take pictures of it and remember such beauty till the day you die.
If life gives you zen...
...you repay it with yen.
If life gives you a broken heart...
...you glue it back together with the pitch from the bottommost pits of h311
If life gives you Apple's new product from 2022, today...
... I will flatly refuse it; I have already built my own phone with my own OS forked from a bunch of source code by then.
If life gives you a LostDriver...
You point it to the next street you should take a left on.
If life gives you overdue library books...
... you give it back to whoever originally borrowed it.
If life gives you hot pockets with hot sauce seasoned all over it...
...you at the everything out of it.
If life gives you banana sauce...
you make banana sauce products.
If life gives you tough gaming decisions...
...you throw the controller at a friend.
If life gives you a free membership...
you hope it's lifetime for XBox Live.
If life gives you Lara Croft as a wife...
...you impale her with your branch.
If life gives you rabid fans...
Quote from: lanislori on June 11, 2013, 10:08:51 AM
...you impale her with your branch.
Oh, my sides are killing me. hahaha.
-------------------------------------------------------------
... you run from them!
If life gives you Dave Grohl...
...you comb his facial hair.
If life gives you luck...
you play the lottery!
If life gives you an army of Caterpies...
...you use them to attack a bug catcher.
If life gives you a fever...
...then if you fall asleep your dreams don't make sense o.o
If life gives you a YouTube username that someone else also has...
...you get a username that someone else has. And confusion.
If life gives you soy sauce...
Then i mix it with some rice as a quick meal!
If life gives you a kitkat...
...you break the everything out of it.
If life gives you a letter...
... you read it, and write the sender back
If life gives you a leek...
...you make sure it gets back together with its onion lady.
If life gives you a simple machine...
...you do simple things with it.
If life gives you a way out of something...
... you seize that opportunity. NAO!
If life gives you Zeronos cards (they are cards from Kamen Rider Den-O that lets the secondary Kamen Rider transform into Altair form, but it diminishes after he uses it)...
...you ignore it and try the difficult way.
If life gives you headphones...
... you give it to Ryutaros, so he can dance all night long!
If life gives you jury duty...
...you realise you're the reason why people have to go to jury duty.
If life gives you crayons...
... you give them also to Ryutaros since he likes to draw!
If life gives you Shin-chan...
...you return his crayons.
If life gives you used games...
...you melt them into something new!
If life gives you a choice between certain happiness and sacrificing it all for everything in the world...
...you decide on happiness.
If life gives you said happiness...
... I will sing happy happy joy joy!
If life gives you the chance to be on E3 when Sony smacked Microsoft's face hard...
...you give Microsoft a consolation prize. AND MULTIPLE HIGH-FIVES TO SONY. Hard.
If life gives you a bath tub...
...you start a bubblebath.
If life gives you a choice between the red or blue pill(not a reference to Matrix, but the philosophy itself)...
...take the red pill.
If life gives you answers...
...you let them change your perspective of life- as well as impact your decisions.
If life gives you lies...
... you become Usopp and Urataros!
If life gives you the memories of the Earth...
...you put it in a picture book.
If life gives you...
...you...
If life gives you " "...
... then you will have a hard time in programming, and the QA team will hate you for all eternity..
If life gives you a code that was not tested properly, and is put in production as of right now...
...you conceal your feast when outside.
If life gives you lemonade...
...you make it pink!
If life gives you a potion...
...you pour it out to catch a fairy.
If life gives you a fairy...
...you make it grant you wishes!
If life gives you a crow...
you become the master of all crows!
If life gives you a wimpy sidekick....
...kick his side until he is no longer wimpy.
If life gives you adjectives...
... you know your grammar lessons now!
If life gives you countermeasures...
...you count that all you have measured.
If life gives a sub...
... you now have a free meal!
If life gives you way...
...you pon.
If life gives you candy...
...you share it with someone with a sweet tooth.
If life gives you lost time...
... you ride the DenLiner to travel to that lost time!
If life gives you the Clock Up ability Kamen Rider Kabuto has...
...you use it to turn back time!
If life gives you an electric guitar...
... you play it like John Frusciante!
If life gives you a song that matches your current mood...
...you listen to it and keep a hard copy.
If life gives you a greedy familia...
...you give them Monopoly money.
If life gives you an angry mob...
...you calm them down with a pitiful sob.
If life gives you a life of rhymes...
you rhyme all the time and enjoy it or else you'll soil it.
If life gives you pie...
... you eat it!
If life gives you Sriracha sauce...
...you put it on all the pho you can.
If life gives you pickles...
... you hand them to someone else cuz you dont like pickles.
If life gives you broken headphones...
... you use them as noise-cancellers instead!
If life gives you Dave's Insanity Sauce...
...you use it on your fries!
If life gives youa can of nos...
... you drink it and become like Cornholio!
If life gives you Cornholio...
you become great!
If life gives you a smokin' hot but dimwitted spouse...
... you educate her, and then she becomes smart and hot!
If life gives you an anorexic girlfriend...
...you offer her help and break up with her if she refuses. No point in suffering with someone who wants to.
If life gives you a girlfriend who chated on you who hasn't told you things because she loves you and doesnt want to lose you...
you bring up what you know and tell her that you're not happy but you forgive her and won't leave her.
If life gives you an ultra-clingy girlfriend...
... you nickname her, "overly attached girlfriend!"
If life gives you a wife-material girlfriend...
...you marry her and make her yours!
If life gives you a girlfriend who lost interest in you but doesnt want to break up...
you break up with her and make sure she won't hate you.
If life gives you a psycho girlfriend....
...you get her locked up in a psych ward in San Lorenzo. (http://www.johngeorgeahs.org/)
If life gives you a psycho exgirlfriend...
you fake your own death and become a new person.
If life gives you a superhero girlfriend...
... you become a Kamen Rider and help her fight crime!
If life gives you an overly attached girlfriend...
...you put her in her place!
If life gives you a psychopathic stalker....
... you Rider Kick them!
If life gives you Kivat the bat the 2nd...
...you make him into a cookie!
If life gives you Golbat...
... you turn him into Batman!
If life gives you bacon-wrapped potatoes...
...you eat them while drinking!
If life gives you potato skins...
... you eat them!
If life gives you pho...
...you eat it with friends!
If life gives you boba tea...
you share it with Boba Fett!
If life gives you an adventure....
You become a pirate king!
If life gives you penguins...
...you take it to the black and white ball!
If life gives you harpies...
...you use it to attack the hoard of zombies chasing you in a mall.
If life gives you a poundcake...
... you scream, "poundcaaaake? poundcaaaaaakeeee!!" in a Goliath's voice (Borderlands)
If life gives you beefcake cartman...
...you throw him in the N64 fps game!
If life gives you tempation...
...you eat hoards of ice creams and forget all about it.
If life gives you free admission...
...you use it to make a profit!
If life gives you infinite money you cannot spend...
...you slap life.
If life gives you a slap to the face...
...you turn the other cheek.
If life gives you your own one-engine airplane....
...you steal its only engine.
If life gives you a stolen engine...
...you install it into a stolen car.
If life gives you a stolen car...
...you return it out of guilt...and a reward.
If life gives you reward money...
....you spend it on lotto tickets to make more money!
If life gives you a worthless lotto ticket...
You burn it and cry!
If life gives you a screen cleaner...
...you clean many screens.
If life gives you a record...
...you put it in your player!
If life gives you waffles...
....you flatten them to make pancakes.
If life gives you pseudo-pancakes...
...you feed them to your pseudo-dog.
If life gives you Bob Ross's "happy bushes"...
...you paint a happy fro to match the happy bushes.
If life gives you a fro...
...you rock it like a bro!
If life give you a bow...
...you sport it like the magical girl you are.
If life gives you a magical staff...
...you use it to part teh ocean.
If life gives you a metaphysical beard...
...you stroke it. Or try to.
If life gives you a Poltergust...
...you exorcise that gust!
If life gives you a poltergeist...
...you become its personal trainer.
If life gives you a kid that fell down the stairs...
...you take it to the vet.
If life gives you a pineapple...
you live in it under the sea!
If life gives you a heavy sword....
You become Nightmare and fight Siegfried!
If life gives you a buffalo...
...you make wings!
If life gives you spegetti...
you throw it against the walls!
If life gives you a dancing dinosaur....
You make Butt Stallion dance with it!
If life gives you Snoop Lion...
...you release Snoop Lion into the Snoop Reserve.
If life gives you an awesomely made hotdog...
...you shoot it at someone.
If life gives you splattered hotdog...
You point at it and say, "splattered hotdog!"
If life gives you a vodka...
...you pass it along.
If life gives you an empty bottle...
you recycle it and save the Earth, man.
If life gives you a hippie protest....
...you join in the fun.
If life gives you neatly wrapped wrapping paper...
...you wrap a sausage with it!
If life gives you a clone of yourself...
...you watch it sleep at night. Then shoot it.
If life gives you limes...
You pour it to your wound!
If life gives you bread...
...you fulfill your duties as a female and make some sandwiches.
If life gives you a stomachache...
Hey, take some bismo!
If life gives you
Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.
You might get diabetes, depending on what the D is...
If life gives you a coffee maker...
...you let it drown in water.
If life gives you an inch of water on your counter...
You wipe that off!
If life gives you a target...
...you shop there.
If life gives you a top...
you use it for everything!
If life gives you an 80s radio...
You listen to every new wave genre on that station!
If life gives you a disco radio station...
...you listen to it nonstop.
If life gives you the most interesting predicament in the world...
...you deconstruct it and find it to be rather ordinary.
If life gives you Word Art...
You turn words into art!
If life gives you a command line...
...you become the become the line leader and command!
If life gives you a graveyard town...
You become the zombie overlord!
If life gives you the Nonary game...
...you still don't complete it after owning it for over a year, despite wanting to finish it.
If life gives you a backlog of games...
...you play each game to the end until you finish it all- then do your homework.
If life gives you never-ending homework...
...and get ovewhelmed by the amount, and just don't do it.
If life gives you alligators...
... you make crocs out of them!
If life gives you Uncle Valle...
...you give him props for being such a great gamer...
If life gives you a book you can read but not understand...
...you are forced to write a poorly worded essay in an hour.
If life gives you an advert...
... you use Adblock on that!
If life gives you Lovendor...
...you attend the concert and get a autograph!
If life gives you Otep...
you go insane.
If life gives you shutter shades...
...you go blind.
If life gives you brass goggles....
you become a pro at dancing to Brass Monkey.
If life gives you people who don't understand grammar....
...you take them to school!
If life gives you people with nothing to lose...
you take them to casinos!
If life gives you the World's Strongest Bodyguard....
...you challenge him in a duel. Of dance.
If life gives you a monkey ball...
You give it to a monkey!
If life gives you Dollar Dash...
...you start running.
If life gives you a run for your money...
...you run the full mile.
If life gives you a moment of angst...
...you physically end it.
If life gives you a Spice girl...
You make her very spicy!
If life gives you a caviar..
...you return them to their mother.
If life gives you too much...
...you save some for later.
If life gives you an incurable migrane...
...you make some margarine.
If life gives you poorly made margirine...
...you use to to grease something up.
If life gives you petrified skin...
...you unveil it to find that it is Zeldafied skin.
If life gives you not thought out puns...
... you're gonna have a bad time.
If life gives you rent money as your budget for the week...
...you buy every chip pack at Dollar Tree.
If life gives you tree of dollar...
... cultivate it and make it grow!
If life gives you a list of tasks to do...
...you make a comment about it in a certain Forum Games game.
If life gives you tiredness in a moment of no tiredness...
..you become tired.
If life gives you orange kitkats..
...you turn them into orange tiktaks.
If life gives you an error message...
You reboot it..
If life gives you padlocks..
You pick it with your homemade lockpick set.
If life gives you easy to solve scenarios...
...you get bored.
If life gives you tedious tasks...
...you accomplish them triumphantly and then move on...
If life gives you monumental tasks...
...you gracefully fall on your face.
If life gives you lack of food...
... you are doomed!
If life gives you trance music...
...you blast it on your stereo.
If life gives you a zombie attack..
(I know this forum is old and probably dead but I have to post this. :3) "When life gives you radioactive lemons, you make glow-in-the-dark lemonade. mmmMMM....." ~Romantically Apocalyptic
If life gives you equations, you throw in random variables.
If life gives you lucifargundam, revoke him of awesomeness
If life gives you a cell phone, you charge it and then forget about it.
HOLD ON, RESET!
If life gives you a onesie...
If life gives you a straw use it to escape the pit of sugary death. ;D
Quote from: Twixz151 on February 03, 2014, 07:55:06 PM
If life gives you a straw use it to escape the pit of sugary death. ;D
Fail. Correction:::
.....you jump into the onesee and read a book by the fire!
If life gives you free passes to Fanime...
Then the struggle is over for you!
If life gives you a chunky cookie..
...you take that chunky cookie, AND EAT IT.
If life gives you the WWE...
... then you complain about how Batista doesn't deserve to win Royal Rumble.
If life gives you tables...
...you turn them around.
If life gives you a friendly bearded metalhead...
...you go join him in the mosh pit at a Motorhead concert.
If life gives you the new Fanime hotel booking policy...
... you either follow the policy, or make a good backup plan.
If life gives you a newborn puppy...
... you call it fluffy and cuddle with it.
If life gives you an empty guitar case...
...You put a Les Paul in it and call it a day.
If life gives you breakfast...
Jump in and fall into wonderland.
If life gives you mirror?
...you look into and get trapped!
If life gives you a top hat...
... you wear it!
If life gives you a bar of soap...
... you use it to wash your hands after dealing with money!
If life gives you a pair of cheap sunglasses....
... you wear it at da beech! (https://forums.fanime.com/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi1165.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fq586%2Fsicse7en%2FTriHard.png&hash=038f30662ced3364be3b527d41e46404e31f6b5d) (http://s1165.photobucket.com/user/sicse7en/media/TriHard.png.html)
If life gives you all of Nujabes' albums..
...you play it while bbqing at the beach!
If life gives you an empty suit of armor...
Slap that shit on!
If life gives you a bag full of dicks...
... you give it to someone to needs them.
If life gives you someone who's stuck on the past...
...you grab their arm and thrust them forwad into the sunset.
If life gives you tropes...
...you toss them out the window!
If life gives you a once in a lifetime eclipse...
...you sleep through it.
If life gives a super awesome album...
... you listen to it countless times!
If life gives you cigars...
...you share them with your friends while enjoy brandy!
If life gives you an encrypted drive...
...you sell it to Edward Snowden.
If life gives you a Nissan Leaf...
...you donate it to charity!
If life gives you a muscle car...
... you put JDM parts into it. (https://forums.fanime.com/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi1165.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fq586%2Fsicse7en%2Fchansub-global-emoticon-ddc6e3a8732cb50f-25x28.png&hash=14870bc9fa9e1ecbd63fd4a9b057ce8872b9fcf2) (http://s1165.photobucket.com/user/sicse7en/media/chansub-global-emoticon-ddc6e3a8732cb50f-25x28.png.html)
If life gives you a slingshot...
...you shoot firey cottonballs from it!
If life gives you an http textbook....
...you create a FanimeCon website!
If life gives you a State of California application...
... you work as a policeman!
If life gives you a mechanical pencil..
You'll waste the day clicking it out as long as you can and pretending it's a needle.
If life gives you a thousand feet of string in 3-inch lengths...
...make a very big paracord bracelet!
If life hands you a pillow case but no pillow...
You fill it with old batteries, then whack someone and take THEIR pillow!
If life gives you a bunch of old batteries...
...you are constantly switching them out of the remote.
If life gives you a shoddy shed...
...tear it down and build a new one!
If life gives you a bootleg autograph of your favorite actor/actress...
...you brag about it to your friends!
If life gives you iced tea during hot weather...
... you body that ice tea and make some more!
If life gives you your 4th pot of coffee.
.... Youll have a morning like i did a few weeks ago!
If life gives you debt...
... you pay them off!
If life gives you an advice...
...you check it on Snopes before using.
If life gives you a photo of your favorite cosplayer...
... you get hyped and post that on your wall.
If life gives you the last puppy in the world..
..you hope that it is a girl and take it to get cloned
If life give you flying fish flakes..
... you toss it!
If life gives you a camel...
...you make a Geico commercial!
If life gives you an advance copy of Kill La Kill on BD...
You buy a blue ray player or new console to start playing blu rays.
If life gives you an easy streak...
Try your hand at winning the lottery
if life gives you an alien baby...
..raise the baby to be a superhero!
If life gives you one-hundred pounds of gummy bears...
... you build a gummy bear army and rule the seven seas!
If life gives you a lamp...
...you light up the room!
If life gives you an alternate identitiy...
... you start over!
If life gives you a pie shake...
...make sure they're not sugarless before eating.
If life gives you the Heartbleed bug...
..you patch and only go to sites with improved ssl.
If life gives you a trick question...
...you dodge the question.
If life gives you extremely good weather...
... you go to the beach!
If life gives you Koja Kitchen...
...you make the most awesome and not cheapest curry you can think off.
If life gives you a potato...
... You bake it!
If life gives you a newborn baby..
... You make it your minion.
If life gives you an antiquated graphics card...
...play some classic Quake or Unreal with it.
If life gives you a rubber stamp.
... You stamp each dollar bill you come across with it.
If life gives you an improved ssh...
....you silence anyone who gets in your way.
If life gives you a scholarship...
...you go to clown college.
If live gives you a basket of cats...
.... go buy lots of cat food.
If life gives you a final boss...
...press x to not die.
If life gives you duct tape...
... put the tape on the duck.
If life gives you a good squeeze...
...then all the misery and sorrows will be dispersed.
If life gives you a set of golf clubs...
... sell them on ebay.
If life gives you giant millipedes...
dissect them for science.
If life gives you a hardsuit (one that lets you move around and fight in)...
...you calm down and soften it up.
If life gives you death...
You ask your homeboy before hand to revive you with the dragon balls.
If life gives you a hail marry...