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Adam Cullen

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Nerd Courting Feedback
« on: May 30, 2012, 04:39:16 PM »

Hello out there!  I felt that nerd courting went really well this year!  That being said, I am always looking to improve, so if you were able to attend, please pop in here and give me a quick review and any changes/additions/subtractions you would like to see next year!
-Adam
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lovelessneko

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Re: Nerd Courting Feedback
« Reply #1 on: May 30, 2012, 04:58:18 PM »

Moar stories. And sex.

I'm really glad I decided to go. I was on the fence about going since I wanted to just sit in the hot tub with my friends ahaha. Really an eye opener for the whole dating thing since I never fully understood it myself (thanks mom for teaching me nothing! and then confusing the crap out of me afterwards).

But because of time limitations, it would be cool if you didn't get side tracked so often. Answered more questions. That's all I could think of. Oh! and bring your own wireless mic so you can wander around the room.
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UnderwhelmingHero

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Re: Nerd Courting Feedback
« Reply #2 on: May 30, 2012, 06:31:14 PM »

Firstly, I would like to comment that the intro to the speech has tones of Buddhism to it, which I enjoyed quite a bit. It's when the reality that we live in contradicts the imagination that we believe in that causes us to suffer... so in that sense, nerds are terrible Buddhists.

I felt reassured about my status in the world through your talk. You made some awesome points, I agree with the idea that activities such as Fanime allow us to have preset parameters regarding our communication. I felt like most people at the con were easy enough to meet because of our shared interests.

The fact that you didn't use notes and gave your panel free form was awesome. It made it feel incredibly natural, and I think that is why it was so easy to connect with you. That being said, I don't think a general outline with some time notes would hurt. I enjoyed your anecdotes but I can see how some people would believe that it detracts from the message that you are trying to portray.

I really liked how you came out and had a little continuation of your panel afterwards. That's awesome, man. However, some people don't have the confidence to speak out about their relationships and sexual problems in front of a crowd. Have you tried setting up a formspring/tumblr ask/ anonymous option for their questions to be answered? You said yourself that nerds have a better ability communicating through type instead of face to face.

Your panel was probably the most informative and fun thing I did at Fanime this weekend. Thanks for sharing with us. 
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mcaaron

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Re: Nerd Courting Feedback
« Reply #3 on: May 30, 2012, 06:42:35 PM »

Loved it! I was engrossed the entire panel. It made me feel better about myself and opened my eyes to how we nerdfolk court. I felt a little less
alone and realized that the way I thought about, and courted, women was normal. The sex tips were good too!

I only wish you could have a similar panel at SNAFU CON in September!
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virilevocalist

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Re: Nerd Courting Feedback
« Reply #4 on: May 31, 2012, 12:54:13 PM »

I thought it was both informative and hilarious! I wish I could have taken advantage of the Q&A session and the informal meetup afterwards, but I had to meet some friends for drinks. Next time, perhaps more concrete advice about the steps prior to dating, like approaching, etc, would be useful. I feel that merely focusing my interactions with women who are introduced through mutual friends is too limiting, but summoning my guts to just randomly approach someone without coming off like a creeper is difficult.
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Adam Cullen

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Re: Nerd Courting Feedback
« Reply #5 on: May 31, 2012, 09:54:34 PM »

Thanks for the feedback everybody!  I am going to try to be more connected over the next year in preparation for next year, so I made a tumblr and a twitter. 
http://fictonia.tumblr.com/
@fictonia

Add them if they are your thing!
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TheMaKaKi

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Re: Nerd Courting Feedback
« Reply #6 on: June 07, 2012, 06:41:21 PM »

Went to your Panel for a bit but had to leave unfortunately. You probably know by now- you're quite a smooth talker haha. You're someone who posseses high charisma, relatability, and entertainment skills, but as mentioned, you probably knew that! Only thing that did slightly bug me is how you could not really move around. Great orators have booming voices and would, if they chose to, pace reasonably in the front. Personally, I'd rather see you with a wireless mic walking around and making more eye contact with the audience. Your stories are captivating and your tattoo/shirt showing was funny, now look at us!!! (Sounds creeperish...oh wells)

Or if you so prefer to be like Martin Luther King Jr, you can just amaze us standing at podium haha

As for the content, from the lot that I heard, it was entertaining but of course you had forewarned that not everyone will agree or has experienced the same things. What I thought was weird is that...do "nerds" in technical terms really exist anymore? As a female who's had a crush on anime and Japan since I was a wee lassie, I never thought I was a "nerd" persay but just liked nerdy things instead. You can throw some Red Dwarf or Elfen Lied at me and I'd understand...and laugh. But I guess dating in the "nerd world" for a girl is totally different. What you described for guys somewhat confirmed how my bf acts but for me, it wasn't the case. I perceived myself as a normal lady who has dated around, played the games, and had a few boyfriends here and there- normal dating life. Most of the guys I dated though did like some thing "nerdy" whether it be anime or games. So I am not sure what my ramble is concluding to but just that I enjoyed your panel but felt like it was not relatable at times due to gender biases and how I perceived myself.

Praises for your stand with the super, awkward nerdy guys, but maybe expand a bit to incorporate different psychological personalities in your audience. You're certainly not obligated to accommodate everyone nor do I think you're a psychologist in any way??? (Unless you are, apologies!) But it feels like "nerds" are being more incorporated into being just "normal" people who like nerdy things. One day, the things we like may not be nerdy anymore. Then we won't even have the nerd label- scary. -All of entirely my opinion! Will not respond to mean trollings or flames :)-
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Adam Cullen

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Re: Nerd Courting Feedback
« Reply #7 on: June 08, 2012, 02:13:37 PM »

Yeah, I would way prefer to move around.  This has happened every year actually, I get to the panel room, I ask if they have a wireless mic, they say "You need to have requested that in your panel application" and I say "I did request that in my application.  It's the only thing I requested."  and they say "oh, well, we'll send someone to get one for you" and then they never come back.  I've given 5 panels at fanime over the years, and this has happened at all 5 of them.  I'm actually going to bring my own mic next year, heh.
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flyingtoastr

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Re: Nerd Courting Feedback
« Reply #8 on: June 30, 2012, 08:10:08 PM »

It was an excellent panel, Adam. Sorry about getting feedback to you so late. I've had trouble thinking about Fanime in general for reasons I dislike talking about. I'm very happy that you took the time to answer my question though. I was the Adam Jensen cosplayer.
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