If Life Gives You...

[Lucifargundam]

...you use it to part teh ocean.

If life gives you a metaphysical beard...

[lanislori]

...you stroke it. Or try to.

If life gives you a Poltergust...

[Lucifargundam]

...you exorcise that gust!

If life gives you a poltergeist...

[lanislori]

...you become its personal trainer.

If life gives you a kid that fell down the stairs...

[Lucifargundam]

...you take it to the vet.

If life gives you a pineapple...

[PinkHairSasuke]

you live in it under the sea!

If life gives you a heavy sword....

[limDsage]

You become Nightmare and fight Siegfried!

If life gives you a buffalo...

[Lucifargundam]

...you make wings!

If life gives you spegetti...

[PinkHairSasuke]

you throw it against the walls!

If life gives you a dancing dinosaur....

[limDsage]

You make Butt Stallion dance with it!

If life gives you Snoop Lion...

[Lucifargundam]

...you release Snoop Lion into the Snoop Reserve.

If life gives you an awesomely made hotdog...

[lanislori]

...you shoot it at someone.

If life gives you splattered hotdog...

[limDsage]

You point at it and say, "splattered hotdog!"

If life gives you a vodka...

[lanislori]

...you pass it along.

If life gives you an empty bottle...

[PinkHairSasuke]

you recycle it and save the Earth, man.

If life gives you a hippie protest....

[lanislori]

...you join in the fun.

If life gives you neatly wrapped wrapping paper...

[Lucifargundam]

...you wrap a sausage with it!

If life gives you a clone of yourself...

[lanislori]

...you watch it sleep at night. Then shoot it.

If life gives you limes...

[limDsage]

You pour it to your wound!

If life gives you bread...

[lanislori]

...you fulfill your duties as a female and make some sandwiches.

If life gives you a stomachache...