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Author Topic: Missed Connections Fanime 2012  (Read 25386 times)

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summaaraiwarrior

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Re: Missed Connections Fanime 2012
« Reply #60 on: June 03, 2012, 07:10:08 PM »

I honestly wished I could've had conversations with more people at Fanime! People would ask for a picture, say thank you, and walk off, and not give me a chance to conversate with them. Do I look like one of those stuck up Asians?! I hope not! :/ I was too busy trying to not get entangled in my wig and trying to keep that Slutty Stitch from not causing too much trouble.

I feel totally uncomfortable taking pictures by myself. So next time, take a picture with me!
(Btw, I was the Space Channel 39 Miku!)

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Evaunit01berserk

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Re: Missed Connections Fanime 2012
« Reply #61 on: June 03, 2012, 08:49:25 PM »

People would ask for a picture, say thank you, and walk off, and not give me a chance to conversate with them. Do I look like one of those stuck up Asians?! I hope not! :

LOL, no you don't look like one of those stuck up asians, but most people were likely trying to avoid giving off that creeper vibe by staying around too long. If you are a male photographer, unless you know the cosplayer personally, if the cosplayer dosen't seem to want to talk or is busy, they tend to move on quickly rather then stand around and risk looking weird.
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summaaraiwarrior

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Re: Missed Connections Fanime 2012
« Reply #62 on: June 03, 2012, 10:00:40 PM »

People would ask for a picture, say thank you, and walk off, and not give me a chance to conversate with them. Do I look like one of those stuck up Asians?! I hope not! :

LOL, no you don't look like one of those stuck up asians, but most people were likely trying to avoid giving off that creeper vibe by staying around too long. If you are a male photographer, unless you know the cosplayer personally, if the cosplayer dosen't seem to want to talk or is busy, they tend to move on quickly rather then stand around and risk looking weird.

Haha, after the picture was taken, I would stand there awkwardly hoping they would start a conversation, but they just took the picture and ran away, so I'm just like WHAT....  ??? ??? ??? :-[ :-\
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Bushido

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Re: Missed Connections Fanime 2012
« Reply #63 on: June 03, 2012, 10:12:08 PM »

Haha, after the picture was taken, I would stand there awkwardly hoping they would start a conversation, but they just took the picture and ran away, so I'm just like WHAT....  ??? ??? ??? :-[ :-\

Take the initiative. Talk to them. But I think it's easier when you talk to other cosplayers. People that take pictures usually just come, take pic, and then move on to the next person.

Just quick off topic I see in your sig that you play water polo. Do you swim also?
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h-chan

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Re: Missed Connections Fanime 2012
« Reply #64 on: June 03, 2012, 10:14:31 PM »

Whoa there, thread-jackers, save it for the PM ;)
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Nina Star 9

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Re: Missed Connections Fanime 2012
« Reply #65 on: June 03, 2012, 10:44:23 PM »

I honestly wished I could've had conversations with more people at Fanime! People would ask for a picture, say thank you, and walk off, and not give me a chance to conversate with them. Do I look like one of those stuck up Asians?! I hope not! :/ I was too busy trying to not get entangled in my wig and trying to keep that Slutty Stitch from not causing too much trouble.

I feel totally uncomfortable taking pictures by myself. So next time, take a picture with me!
(Btw, I was the Space Channel 39 Miku!)


I actually had the opposite problem, where I -didn't- want people to start a conversation, but most of them just wouldn't leave! I tend to attract creepers, though, especially when dressed as the Major (Ghost in the Shell, this was Friday night), and some as Ulala. Too bad. (I guess I look too badass in my other cosplays that no one wants to mess with me!)

I talked to you, though! Somewhat, at least!
(I was the Space Channel 5 Ulala...did you see the pics I posted of us in the photo thread?)
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lonemeditater

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Re: Missed Connections Fanime 2012
« Reply #66 on: June 05, 2012, 02:12:39 PM »

I actually had the opposite problem, where I -didn't- want people to start a conversation, but most of them just wouldn't leave! I tend to attract creepers, though, especially when dressed as the Major (Ghost in the Shell, this was Friday night), and some as Ulala. Too bad. (I guess I look too badass in my other cosplays that no one wants to mess with me!)

I talked to you, though! Somewhat, at least!
(I was the Space Channel 5 Ulala...did you see the pics I posted of us in the photo thread?)

You're the kind of person I'm afraid of talking to...

Though, I don't generally talk to many of the people I ask to take pictures of beyond a compliment on their cosplay. I also tend not to take that many pictures. Most of them are of dudes though because I'm paranoid of meeting women who think I'm hitting on them. I think my favorite person this year was Tutu-Master Chief. That guy was awesome.
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Maskenlav

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Re: Missed Connections Fanime 2012
« Reply #67 on: June 05, 2012, 02:21:08 PM »

You're the kind of person I'm afraid of talking to...

Though, I don't generally talk to many of the people I ask to take pictures of beyond a compliment on their cosplay. I also tend not to take that many pictures. Most of them are of dudes though because I'm paranoid of meeting women who think I'm hitting on them. I think my favorite person this year was Tutu-Master Chief. That guy was awesome.

I totally understand you! Most of the girls I try to seek are either taken by a guy or are bi dating another girl OR are totally underage or hell of cute!
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Jyunishinsho

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Re: Missed Connections Fanime 2012
« Reply #68 on: June 05, 2012, 03:04:59 PM »

Just throwing this one out there:

Setting: The dance on Saturday night
You were a Chun-Li cosplayer
I was a guy with sunglasses with black/white pants
We both did the splits. You were in front of me and pictures were taken
That moment seriously rocked. Those were good times ^_^

Mod edit: dance terminology
« Last Edit: January 24, 2013, 10:02:20 AM by ewu »
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lonemeditater

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Re: Missed Connections Fanime 2012
« Reply #69 on: June 06, 2012, 12:02:45 AM »

You're the kind of person I'm afraid of talking to...

Though, I don't generally talk to many of the people I ask to take pictures of beyond a compliment on their cosplay. I also tend not to take that many pictures. Most of them are of dudes though because I'm paranoid of meeting women who think I'm hitting on them. I think my favorite person this year was Tutu-Master Chief. That guy was awesome.

I totally understand you! Most of the girls I try to seek are either taken by a guy or are bi dating another girl OR are totally underage or hell of cute!


I think you missed my point completely. Don't associate yourself with me. I'm sorry, it's just that my point was that I'm not interested at all. Your post implies that I was interested. Don't put words in my mouth.
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Maskenlav

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Re: Missed Connections Fanime 2012
« Reply #70 on: June 06, 2012, 01:33:11 AM »

I think you missed my point completely. Don't associate yourself with me. I'm sorry, it's just that my point was that I'm not interested at all. Your post implies that I was interested. Don't put words in my mouth.

someone's got their panties in a bunch. I didnt put "words in your mouth" as I wasnt speaking on your behalf so I was merely thinking you wanted to MEET women as you said you were afraid to so I simply agreed because I too sometimes am afraid to meet them out of fear of rejection or scaring them. So yeah dont sound to smart there buddy cause anyone else would have said something similar to mine
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lonemeditater

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Re: Missed Connections Fanime 2012
« Reply #71 on: June 06, 2012, 02:08:02 AM »

I think you missed my point completely. Don't associate yourself with me. I'm sorry, it's just that my point was that I'm not interested at all. Your post implies that I was interested. Don't put words in my mouth.

someone's got their panties in a bunch. I didnt put "words in your mouth" as I wasnt speaking on your behalf so I was merely thinking you wanted to MEET women as you said you were afraid to so I simply agreed because I too sometimes am afraid to meet them out of fear of rejection or scaring them. So yeah dont sound to smart there buddy cause anyone else would have said something similar to mine

Can we please leave my underwear out of this? I never said I wanted to meet women. You're still missing the point. You should probably check your grammar again before we talk about who's trying to sound smart. I was going to state that you really didn't understand anything, but I decided not to; you've made it quite necessary. Once again, don't associate yourself with me. I'm done here. I hope you will be able to communicate and understand things more clearly in the future.
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kane64

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Re: Missed Connections Fanime 2012
« Reply #72 on: June 06, 2012, 02:18:34 AM »

Whoa guy!! Can we not actually turn this thread into a Craigslist post? This is suppose to be a fun place to go, not some place to show off how angry you are feeling right now. Calm down and please post somewhere else if you are going to be angry on the forums.
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h-chan

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Re: Missed Connections Fanime 2012
« Reply #73 on: June 06, 2012, 09:53:12 AM »

Yes, please take your argument elsewhere. Thank you.
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TheMaKaKi

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Re: Missed Connections Fanime 2012
« Reply #74 on: June 06, 2012, 07:06:03 PM »

I'm looking for a guy who cosplayed as final fantasy vii advent children (He was volunteering at fanime too). I danced with him at the black and white ball and I talked to him once. If you guys know who he is, please let me know (His name is Edward). I would like to talk to him again. ^_^

I'm also looking for the paramedic who was working at the first aid station at the Arcade hall (He's blonde and has blue eyes). My friends had to go home so I stayed with him and we talked about all sorts of things. Unfortunately, he had to go to an emergency and I forgot to ask for his name. If any of you guys know his name or who he is, please let me know~ (:

I remember the EMT paramedic blonde! He was very nice :D got two band-aids from him. He told us a funny story about the ambulance visit during the weekend...Apparently something having to do with a Gandalf and Darth Vader beating up an elf/dwarf XD WTFLOL! He did looked older though and told us that he took this weekend job because he knew it'd be fun haha
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SemiEvilJoe

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Re: Missed Connections Fanime 2012
« Reply #75 on: June 07, 2012, 12:29:14 PM »

Hello all i usually take photos at FanimeCon and i was there on Saturday and came across a female prof. laydon and idk what else to say. :-[
http://i17.photobucket.com/albums/b75/semieviljoe/FanimeCon%202012/DSC_0215.jpg
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yggdrasilsys

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Re: Missed Connections Fanime 2012
« Reply #76 on: June 07, 2012, 10:12:15 PM »

how do you guys generally define "creeper"? I was balling up my courage to take a photo of various cosplayers and I may have think I have weirded them out in some way.
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TheMaKaKi

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Re: Missed Connections Fanime 2012
« Reply #77 on: June 07, 2012, 10:16:03 PM »

how do you guys generally define "creeper"? I was balling up my courage to take a photo of various cosplayers and I may have think I have weirded them out in some way.

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=creeper

Creeper   

Edward Cullen

"Edward, I saw you watching me sleep last night."
"..."
"Yes, you are a creeper."
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Nina Star 9

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Re: Missed Connections Fanime 2012
« Reply #78 on: June 08, 2012, 02:05:58 PM »

how do you guys generally define "creeper"? I was balling up my courage to take a photo of various cosplayers and I may have think I have weirded them out in some way.
I know this may not seem helpful at first, but I generally define a creeper as someone whose actions actually or potentially (as in "if they knew about it," not as in "if someone somewhere could possibly be creeped out by this," since that woul make everyone a creeper with everything they do!) creep out or make uncomfortable (or scared, etc.) another party, typically a female party, though this isn't exclusive to men creeping out women (or young girls), since there are female creepers, and males can get creeped on by both females and other males.

Now for ways to tell if you are being creepy, and hopefully how to avoid them. Some things are clearly creepy, like taking upskirt photos of girls without them knowing (I think this falls pretty squarely into the "potential" category above!). Some things aren't, since it's all subjective. The basic rule of not being creepy is this: if the person you are interacting with seems uncomfortable in any way with the interaction, you are very likely being a creeper. Again, it's all subjective, and things that might not be creepy at all in another circumstance might seem creepy because this Princess Peach is -really- trying to go meet their friend and you just won't shut up about how much you love Mario RPG, yet if she wasn't distracted by trying to get somewhere, she might find the exact conversation to be enjoyable. When she finally meets her friends, she might say "I would have been here earlier, but wow, there was this creepy guy who just wouldn't shut up about Mario RPG!" simply because you couldn't read the signs that she was not comfortable with the conversation (in this case, for a specific reason that has nothing to do with your actions).

Some basic tips: Watch your eyes and tone of voice. People, especially women, and even more especially attractive women who get hit on a lot, notice the use of the Gaze. Your eye movements might make the person you are interacting with feel uncomfortably objectified or otherwise violated in some way. You'll have to keep that in mind. Of course, most women who wear sexy cosplays know what they are getting into and don't mind people to see what they are revealing; otherwise, they wouldn't wear it. Most people wouldn't mind just looking. However, when it crosses the line into gawking or oogling, which can be subjective but the basic concept is "don't stare, especially at her body, look at her face while talking to her," it becomes a problem. Also, tone of voice can be an issue, since a normal conversation with a different inflection can be taken as innocent or creepy, depending.

Watch what you say. This can be everything from blatently hitting on someone to simply acting odd (such as being too prying, too argumentative, etc.). This year, I had someone who talked to me a bit, left, came back, and started grilling me on things like why I prefer certain video games or why I live where I do in comparison to my major in college (I have no problem telling people basic info like the general area of CA where I reside or what I study in school, but that's about as personal as I get), and the more I tried to evade the questions, the more insistent he became. Don't be that guy. If someone seems to be evading your questions, doesn't seem to want to talk about something, you think you might be getting too personal, etc., if you keep interacting with that person in the same way, you are probably being a creeper. Also, if you just walk up to someone and start commenting on their looks or make obviously sexual comments, you might be creepin', depending on how they feel about it. In fact, you will most likely be creepin'. If you want to comment on something to start a conversation, start with talking about whatever series or character they are from, or if you don't know what it is, compliment how you like their costume and ask them what it is from or how the made it. Most people like to talk about things they like, and if you make the conversation less about them, their looks, etc., and more about their costume or the series they are from, they are much less likely to find you creepy. You most likely already have something in common, since you are at the same con together!

Don't touch people. Just don't. Don't grab at anything, even an arm or shoulder, don't hug without permission (and if the person doesn't give permission, don't act all pouty or insist on a hug or anything like that, just walk away), etc.

Treat people like people and act like a person. Cosplayers are people in costume, not characters, and not pretty things for your amusement. A lot of people seem to forget this. Also, don't act like an idiot yourself. I know that I find it refreshing when someone talks to me when I'm in costume like they would anyone off the street, rather than treating me like I'm the character or treating me like I'm an object. Actually, I'd say that treating a person like a person is probably my #1 tip on how to not be a creeper. If you keep that in mind, you're likely to be fine, given that you have any semblance of social skills or ability to read body langauge at all.

A small note that you may not realize (and I touched on earlier a bit) is that it may not be personal. The person you want to interact with could be distracted or in a hurry. If it is a female cosplayer, especially a particularly attractive one, she may be defensive because she's been hit on by every other heterosexual male in the convention and doesn't want to be hit on again. However, if someone seems uncomfortable with your interaction, politely excuse yourself from that interaction. Leave. Don't hang around and make them even more uncomfortable. That's what makes someone a creeper -- making others uncomfortable with your attentions towards them. You can be a creeper right off the bat, too, just don't make sexual advances right away, oogle people, take inappropriate photos, etc., and you should be fine there. You don't seem to be worried about being that kind of creeper, anyway.



When simply taking a photo and not interacting in another way, it's really easy to -not- be a creeper. Don't hang around awkwardly, either before or after. Don't ask for odd poses or take really low- or high-angle shots. Ask confidiently and smoothly, or, if the cosplayer is already posing for pics (especially if there is a crowd of photographers), simply hold up your camera and kind of point to it to let them know that you are joining the fray. If there is a big crowd of photogs, don't try talking to the cosplayer while they are posing and while there are still photogs around (as a cosplayer, I can tell you that they tend to come in waves, so you can easily wait for a small gap), and if you want to talk to them, stand off to the side and wait, don't just stand there and stare at them. Only take pics when the cosplayer is actually posing, don't just snap them off randomly. It's really basic, but it really helps. I can't speak for "most cosplayers," but I can say that I don't creeped out by a simple photo request unless the photog breaks one or more of these guidelines (typically more, unless it's something like hanging around for long periods before and after photos, not saying anything, or if someone were to attempt an upskirt shot or down cleavage shot or something).

When asking for photos -with- someone, please make it clear that you are asking for a photo -with- them and not -of- them. Also, ask before you touch the cosplayer. Always. Please. This is important. I don't tend to take pictures with fans except on rare occasion (say, they are a huge fan of whatever obscure JRPG I'm cosplaying, or they are 6 years old, or they are another cosplayer who might have something matching [I got matching large hammer shots with the Thor cosplayer, for example], etc.), but I started to this year because so many people were asking for a pic of me and then jumping into the shot themselves. This is even worse when they then proceed to put their arms around with without permission, since I really don't like to be touched (and some of my costumes are fragile). Again, if the cosplayer seems uncomfortable, say, they are trying to squirm away from your grip, watch for that and apologize.



Basically, if you aren't socially inept, aren't making unwanted sexual advances (a lot of "creepiness" tends to have sexual overtones), and are treating people like people, you should be fine. This post may seem a bit long, but really, it's not nearly as hard as it seems.

And really, if some random person thinks you are a creeper for a single, innocent interaction, then that's more their problem than yours. You can't help that. But if someone thinks you are being a creeper, take a look at what you are doing and try to see how it could be interpreted as such, and work on changing on that. A lot of people don't seem to realize when they are being a creeper, so if someone thinks you are, don't just dismiss it, see if you were doing something (say, you didn't realize you were staring at her breasts, or you said something that could come across as inappropriate, etc.) that would make the person think that.


I hope that helps!
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The Hatter

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Re: Missed Connections Fanime 2012
« Reply #79 on: June 08, 2012, 05:13:08 PM »

To the girl that came up to me and told me they really liked my costume, I apologize for not conversing.  I was very drunk, had just started a prescription to Adderall, and at a complete loss for words.  I now feel like a big jerk.

I was the steam punk hatter.
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