If Life Gives You...

[PinkHairSasuke]

you go insane.

If life gives you shutter shades...

[Lucifargundam]

...you go blind.

If life gives you brass goggles....

[PinkHairSasuke]

you become a pro at dancing to Brass Monkey.

If life gives you people who don't understand grammar....

[Lucifargundam]

...you take them to school!

If life gives you people with nothing to lose...

[PinkHairSasuke]

you take them to casinos!

If life gives you the World's Strongest Bodyguard....

[lanislori]

...you challenge him in a duel. Of dance.

If life gives you a monkey ball...

[limDsage]

You give it to a monkey!

If life gives you Dollar Dash...

[lanislori]

...you start running.

If life gives you a run for your money...

[Lucifargundam]

...you run the full mile.

If life gives you a moment of angst...

[lanislori]

...you physically end it.

If life gives you a Spice girl...

[limDsage]

You make her very spicy!

If life gives you a caviar..

[lanislori]

...you return them to their mother.

If life gives you too much...

[Lucifargundam]

...you save some for later.
If life gives you an incurable migrane...

[lanislori]

...you make some margarine.

If life gives you poorly made margirine...

[Lucifargundam]

...you use to to grease something up.

If life gives you petrified skin...

[lanislori]

...you unveil it to find that it is Zeldafied skin.

If life gives you not thought out puns...

[limDsage]

... you're gonna have a bad time.

If life gives you rent money as your budget for the week...

[lanislori]

...you buy every chip pack at Dollar Tree.

If life gives you tree of dollar...

[limDsage]

... cultivate it and make it grow!

If life gives you a list of tasks to do...

[lanislori]

...you make a comment about it in a certain Forum Games game.

If life gives you tiredness in a moment of no tiredness...